Category Archives: random

So many cat hair!

15 Thursday Feb 2018

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So far so good. Haven’t touched the facebooks all year. Same for most kinds of media too, news, shows, radio, papers, name it. I was going to keep track of podcasts, videos and such, I did look up, but by the end of January I was already up to several dozen bookmarks. Too many that I care to count. So much for that. I’ll come back to this.

I’ve been rather down and out past few weeks anyway I’ve stopped keeping up… it gets like that. No matter what it is, it ends up being more demoralizing than not. The fun things become the depressing ones, things that would normally motivate and energize start feeling like a chore. Sucks.

And wow, time flies. Halfway through February already. Two weeks ago I was going to write this, but before that wanted to keep working on a piece by Fernando Sor I first learned many years ago, and stopped playing. Yeah, after going through the pile of sheet music I came across it, thinking it was one of those I had never came around to learning all the way through, was looking at maybe trying something new. Didn’t take long to realize it wasn’t. It’s next on the chopping block for the guitar vlog, I guess, I’ve added it to the top of my setlist for now.

It’s kind of difficult, so I remember why I had put it aside. It’s so much fun to play though, amazing parts that feel really rewarding to pull off, just really fun and cheery music. But hard, not super insane fuck you hard, but tough. Until a few days ago I’d go at it sometimes several hours a day, slowly, faster and sometimes too fast, sometimes with the metronome just over and over going back over the same bars. Repeating the variations on their own, then once in a while trying the whole song. I barely played anything else all of January.

Brings me to the video part. Only have a few recordings, none of which I’m really satisfied with. I’m still not sure where to go from here. Was thinking about maybe streaming it some, see who shows up. I don’t know. A bit why I’ve been loitering here in procrastination station until today.
Then I was surprised while login in to see the .org page I set up has been getting several hundred views consistently since last September of so. That’s awesome, I guess. Zero feedback or contacts about it though, unless that’s what that crazy hate mail harpy was about, she even came out in person to mock me over a cup of coffee… yeah, I guess that’s what she might have been about. What… so fucking weird, so much stupid. It would explain her behavior some. Not very good at paying attention to what people are saying is she?

Yeah, so I’m an orphaned bastard and I really don’t care about it beyond that, and I got cancer once, haha, I’m pretty open about that, come up with something better next time dumb fucks, your troll game is weak. Pretending we’re all friendly and sympathetic ugh? Fucking calling me at new year’s too to mock me some more. Plenty other angles you could’ve come at me with going on what I was telling you about. But you… Gee, what a dumb fucking… harpy, fucking erotomaniacal troll harpy bitch. Shooo! Months and months of Shooo!

Anyway… the PDF and it’s front page, it’s sorta like with Capicorn, there’s not really anything to follow it up with. So it just kinda stays there. Not much to do about it.

…send more kibble
Leonard isn’t much of a fan of snow, and being out there alone gets boring, so I’ve kept up with spending just about all my time inside this tiny five sided box of an apartment. He’s gotten pretty good at climbing up that pole, wow. You should see him go. I’ll have to make a clip of that. I caught him at it once but it was kind of out of focus and I screwed up by flipping the camera sideways halfway through it. I started playing video games some more again around December. Watched the hell out of Battle Brothers too, some Total War. Played some Oxygen Not Included (what a silly game… lol), Subnautica is pretty cool, fun, if a bit scary :D Space Pirates and Zombies 2 was fun too. Though I haven’t finished Wastelands 2 yet, not sure I’ll get back into it any time soon. And a couple of hours here and there on a bunch of other titles. If I could get a working PC again, instead of this ageing Mac (doesn’t even have a CD drive! wtf) I would love some Battle Brothers, They Are Billions, stuff like that… but my options are limited, sad face.

I know this page hardly ever gets a view, but you know, ideas on how to make contributing to my paypal slightly more appealing (not much new in that area, though I did splurge some and have more than just coffee or tea on most days in February so far), that would be awesome. Any suggestions on the streaming too. A couple hours of classical guitar a day? Couple times a week maybe? I really hate being on camera, but I feel up to it. It’s one way to start up some conversations I guess. Outside some customer support stuff, few places I bought things at, and a very few occasions with a hand-not-so-full of people, including that French coffee stain hate mail troll and prank caller harpy, I’ve had none of that in many, many months.

If it helps, I can put up a list of those things I like to hear about. On the sidebar maybe? The list has been getting quite long this past year, it’s huge compared to that short list of juicy subversive morsels it started out with. Probably wouldn’t matter, they don’t get the point, or it’s on purpose anyway so they don’t give a rat’s ass. They think they got people and the world all figured out. Crazy nutters.

New Cat Toys

11 Sunday Jun 2017

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New feather creature to hunt thanks to anonymous contributor referred to as “mom” for practical purposes only. In a totally not unrelated manner, three blank books have already been distributed and more are already prepared for assembly. New needles and crochet sticks were also purchased at an undisclosed location, and will be put to good use in the following weeks to come.send more kibbles!!

Twitter is fixed up. Saying I never use it wouldn’t be so far from the truth, so I unfollowed everything and added 4n. I didn’t nuke the tweets this time.

Refreshed to the youtube channel. but I’m not done adding videos from these few other channels I contributed too. I’m lazy, and its fuck all utter bullocks, randomly fucked nonsense of no interest. I might just grab those with more than a couple k views and add them to the yet de-unlisted list… channel looks fine as is, but I’ll get to it soon since it’s annoying me and I’m in a logging mood recently. It’s not like I’m getting much of any feedback about it anyway so wtf. I have more interesting things to do.

I’ve tried to look over some of the rant videos from when I actually did those, from when I got all the subs mostly. Nothing worth the time honestly. All around or less than 100 views, one video response to another tuber that hit over 11k, and not much or any constructive or positive engagement to show for on any of those. We’d have to twist my arm pretty hard to get me to look more into that shit, in strictly sincere speak, seriously. It can be summed up with “mostly randomly constructed discourse of varying decontextualized sentences”.

send more kibbles!!

I have a better idea.

Here are some pictures from the latest cat fishing expedition.

send more kibbles!! 4n really likes to hunt these things.send more kibbles!!send more kibbles!!

Moving on…

30 Tuesday May 2017

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Trying to come up with a sales pitch… not working out to well:

“You don’t want to fuck with Capicorn do you? Great! You’re the perfect candidate then. Adopt one today!

Look at the big derpy ears, the sweet big black eyes full of fire and wonder gazing right back at you. Look at that wild and hungry smile! You’ll see. They’re full of playful joy, kind, sensible and delicate spirits… just don’t fuck with them, basically. You’ll be ok.”

“Please, it’s creeping me out! It stares at me, all the time. Buy it I beg of you! Get it away from me!”

(shhh, it’s just a joke dear, you’re not that creepy. Not to me at least. Well, maybe a little bit. No, that’s not the point. These people they… ugh… nvm… No I would… Ok. … I’m sure someon… Yeah, maybe we’l…. Yeah, sure but coul…. uh huh…)

=====

Seems I’ve gotten ahead of myself again. Trying to make heads or tails of all these inscriptions, lines and passages, is really messing with my head. Adding more entries to the -bda- collection will require a lot more time and research. I’d rather a proper presentation for when it intersects with occult matters before getting too much into the sci-fi fantasy aspects, the sorta satirical elements of the write ups. Some things are harder to spell out, and because many out there still genuinely keep to sacred traditions, carry forward the ancestral lore and the wisdom they hold, and protect the secrets of their power, it would be foolish, short sighted stupidity, to deny them their value and importance. In this age, advances in our understanding of the world, science and technology, have helped strip away the many layers of superstition surrounding these things. It can get hard to tell them apart, and with all the hacks and pink cloud money chasers to boot, hella confusing too. Plus no one’s interested in Capicorn so there’s no rush… I am getting though a strong vibe indicating there’s much misinterpretation as to my motive and such… that should pass. There’s too many pieces missing from the puzzle, and too many dumb things rotting peoples’ brains preventing them from seeing what’s being put in focus, so instead they jump to the easiest conclusions, grab onto some random thought or impression, and ride it pathetically away. Here’s the thing: no worries. Someone in the right mindset might come along, and have something smart and constructive to say about it. Someone who doesn’t overthink the simple while oversimplifying the elaborate, without reading too much into things accidental letting it take the time to reveal its essential. Form and essence… …or just someone who likes the pictures :)

Until then…

hahaha

Just me and the cat. Unemployable and living it large (apparently… living large trapped inside a barely 350 sq. foot studio apartment). Flat out broke, sick, broken, certifiably insane, and yet still managing to inspire jealousy and envy, rage and outrage. Nah, no money. No love either. No friends. No ties. No prospects. Your perfect target, ugh? Kicking since 1995, and beyond on some things, many things, so STFU with the millennial bullshit and the pop-culture spiritual garbage. FU -> .,l,,

It gets a bit cyberpunk at places too, some technical aspects giving it a futuristic edge… unavoidable context: the times are cyberpunk as fuck and these are a product of their time. It seeks to look forward as much as to follow in the old. It’s like diving into the unknown ahead. Awkward corporate things too, politics, trade secrets, privatized knowledge… impractical things. For all those things… looking at it from the outside… yeah, I get it. Some things are harder to spell out.

Getting distracted, confused, disoriented… it’s like I’m having to remind myself I’m not what the markings these things were inspired from are supposed to ward against. Even the mundane descrips are getting to me…

I thought I could do more of this. Turns out not really… so back to the scrapbooks, notepads and random pages. Back to reading silly comics, making sounds on guitar strings and lines on paper. Otherwise it’s just circles…

The little Capicorn manual is still on, so are the certificate-cards. I’m just going to hold off on the fantasy sections until I figure out a better occult introduction, that way I can at least put up some of the artwork without having to fuss too much over them.

Reading over this post… sigh… Better to just let it go for now, yup, most def.

New Props

25 Thursday May 2017

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Feels like I haven’t done one of these things since like forever… the iFan being rather dull (still squeaks alot when its head turns side to side, shitty 1. releases…) and the iFridge getting a rather cold reception.

Anyway, this new blade looks way better than the old one. Plus it’s new, ish. It was left behind in a boutique and found by the new owners. It traces back to some generic mass production line in Taiwan, there’s a little thing with the color in the handle and a little loose in the metal fixture covering where the blade sinks in the handle, but it snaps shut just snug and tightly, and is surprisingly sharp (despite being described as “unsharpened”… not much far from razor like, sure)! Small indentations in the wood finish at the top and bottom ends, and a little scrape near the tip on one side of the sheath, likely from regular hanging and repeated pick-up and put-backs. Seems well balanced and will produce a satisfying swooshing sound under the appropriate circumstances.

It’s much sharper than it’s smaller counterpart, which shows signs of use along the blade and has taken much damage including an impact leaving the odd bend in the lower half of the handle grip. I’ll just put the shorter one on the shelves back where it was, the longer one doesn’t fit there no how, and this way not much changes in the decor of the apartment. And it just looks great there.

So…

send pizza

Come at me yer dirty scoundreling pirates

tell me, which one will you grab for first, the chest or the sword ?
Or just send pizza, that’ll work too, I still like the pizza.

send more feather toys

Wasn’t planning on this, turns out real nice though. Here’s the page I was putting the finishing touches on today before I dun got distracted by the new steel.

So I told him

21 Wednesday Dec 2016

Posted by in international trade law politics philosophy, internet, random

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If you can’t rationally justify and argue in its favour, and properly demonstrate it beyond a reasonable doubt —to someone who is permitted to plug the ears with the fingers while shouting «LALALALALALA I CAN’T HEAR YOU LALALALALA» no less— then yes, your existence is totally a subjective matter of opinion, objectively worth no more than whatever value has the sympathy or reaction you can dredge up for it.

Well there goes my plan to stay away from the forums thing and post stuff over here instead… it’s been weeks! Putting this one here now though, just not into writing much more to it. Had some nice posts started before I left town last month, and forgot to save them (or rather the related media files and links) on the data stick, haven’t even looked at them yet. They feel so old and out of context already, not entirely but… meh. Still had quite some work left to polish it up beyond just scribbled notes randomly scattered across a page, like most of everything else in those logs. It tops my list for the November garbage though, if not for the year, so I’ll get back around to it. And it does have relevance to the whole troll-post era thing too so.

Abracadabra

11 Friday Nov 2016

Posted by in art, arts & crafts, français, random, words

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J’ai un mot magique,
que je n’ai pas besoin d’expliquer,
j’ai simplement à le dire,
pas besoin d’élaborer.
Dès qu’il sort de ma bouche,
dès qu’il est écrit, mentionné,
vous tous êtes discrédités,
insignifiances, imbéciles que vous êtes
avec seule haine dans l’être.
Vous êtes pendu à mes lèvres,
à ma plume, mon clavier,
l’inouïe merveille de son son,
de sa lettre,
qui vous soumettes à l’ensorcellement de sa prononciation.
:P
abracadabra

doc binge

04 Friday Nov 2016

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The past couple of weeks were totally unproductive. Shame, since before that I had managed to update my guitar page, clean up the menus, pretty much do the same with my desktop and organized my homefolders… then I watched some docs.

I was a bit worn out anyway, so coming across those links was timely enough. End result is that it took me longer to write this post than I anticipated, and basically making it about more than it was originally meant to be. Hardly even touched the guitar this week, but today was alright, managed to go through the set of songs without too many fatal errors, having to restart bars or sections entirely, stuff like that. I ramble on more about that on the page itself …

There’s also a bunch of backstories for various rpg characters I’ve been playing, either in video games or other, that I’ve been meaning to gather up in one place. It’s not quite done, and I have so many old files to look at … I’ll probably end up just backdating some posts, linking those and some relevant forums on my gaming page or w/e … Right, and I rummaged through my MTG cards some, shuffling around a bunch of decks and adding in plenty of new cards. Still no dedicated page for that, though I could just link to some deckbuilding communities or gamer hubs. tappedout.net is in short where I hang out when I look about those things online… which isn’t really that often.

So getting to those docs…

I had just previously added a bunch to a playlist (français) on the you’s tubes, but this latest, more intense, doc binge started up with HyperNormalization.

I got to it via thoughtmaybe.com, there’s a nice presentation on the various docs, videos and such, and their collection is an impressive selection of titles, so I took that as an opportunity to catch up on lots of them, many which didn’t even know were out there.

This past week’s doc binge:
-Bitter Lake, and The Century of The Self, also by Adam Curtis.
-Cointelpro 101 (fit in with the theme of a recent anniversary in Black Panthers history)
-Fascism Inc.
-NYPD Biggest Gang In New York
-The Power Principle
-Plutocracy, parts 1 and 2
-Beyond Treason
-China’s Dirty Secrets
-Culture Jam
-Generation Like
-Petropolis
-Subconscious War
-The Revolution Business
-The Fuck-It Point
Like I said, wasn’t taking any notes, don’t really feel like commenting right now, thoughtmaybe.com has nice summaries on them and all the ones I’ve listed there are available on their site, so you can look for them there.

I’ll likely end up using referring to some of those on a page I’m thinking up. A kind of “if you are reading this it’s because you are there” resistance-themed page around great docs, various events, protests, and the politics of revolution. I’m still keeping with the original plan of heading it with de la servitude morderne which is just awesome in my book … a page to talk about activism in film, great hubs on social critiques, major issues around world trade, communications, the environment, climate change, interesting people to follow for current news on those different topics.

Turns out there’s more stuff in there than it might seem… I didn’t want to spam my pages folder with too many pieces about this video or that one… blah blah blah… anyways, so the list is there. I’ve noted a few from the collection already I’m queuing up to watch next, and at least for now this post is here… perhaps I’ll come across it at some point to remind me and elaborate more… sorta “top 10” or favorites per topic / time period… idk… This place is more like a “talking to myself” kinda feel anyway. One idea is to set up my pages as a collection of notes, links and resources from which to share with, copy paste from, and perhaps assuming a particular topic is polished enough, point to in my online discussions… this place is still mostly a mess tho :D like an abandoned warehouse, decrepit factory or old ruins of some kind … at least the menus are nicer now

Updated menus

03 Thursday Nov 2016

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Might have wanted to post separately for these, it’s just that I’ve watched so many over the past weeks, without actually taking any notes on them, and well… I’ll see.

Mostly just wanted to make sure I wrote something about cleaning up the menus and adding a few pages.

Apart from that, for now… let’s see how this works… or I’ll just list them with a title linking where most of them were from…

… jammed, it’s a culture thing, like Buy Nothing Day. We sell a lot of nothing on that day. Tons.

yeah, I’m not sure I’m embedding this correctly… I’ll write up that list of all the ones I watched on thoughtmaybe.com, they have nice summaries, or video descriptions, and plenty more documentaries.

(edit: well then, it was just my browser again, yay… I’ll write up that list anyways. Gonna do something else for now, but I’ll be spending the next few days fixing up this blog again. You know where to find me at.)